La Catedral Metropolitana

It has been an overwhelming two weeks. I feel that I have grown the most within the last two compared to my last twenty-something years. (shut up Vivian you don't need to remind me how old I am :p)
Last week we visited La Catedral Metropolitana de San Salvador. From the first moment I stepped inside this church I was overcome by an uneasy feeling. I suddenly felt like I had a ton of bricks on my chest and I instantly told Vivian, “I don't feel right being here.” We continued the tour with Cristy (who by the way is a kick-ass tour guide). She told us that it took many years to complete the cathedral. She also told us about the the people that died at the Cathedral stairs during Romero's funeral cortege.

We proceeded to go downstairs where the tomb of Archbishop Romero is located. As I walked down there the heaviness on my chest became overpowering. Cristy began to speak about the struggle that Romero carried on his shoulders and how all the Salvadoran people regardless of their religion still hold a great regard to Romero. As we approached the tomb I was moved and began to sob. At first I tried to control it but I was something that I was not able to control. I just kept crying and it is difficult for me to explain the reason why I was moved to such extremes. I have always had a complex relationships with religion. I was raised Catholic but I have not practised since my first year of high school. Recently I have declared myself an agnostic. I believe that there is a higher power but I don't believe in following a doctrine or being part of any organized religion. Being in ES I have had to tackle the question of religion again. I am frustrated when I see leaders from churches scrounging the little money the poor have in order to fulfill their lavish lifestyle.

So why did I become so emotional while Cristy talked? I became emotional because she described how Romero was trying to fight for the poor and that people speak of a great change in ES while there has no been change at all, in fact some people think its worse than before. As soon as Cristy said this it struck such a strong chord in me because it was the exact emotions I felt when I arrived here. I was frustrated and angered by the fact that people had told me that ES had gone into some great changes meanwhile it is perhaps in worse state than it was before. Just because more malls are built it doesn't necessarily mean that their is progress.